walletThe best that I can tell, most of the wallet-carrying, male, western world puts its wallets in the back right pants pocket. The back pocket makes sense, but why the right? I blame my father, a lefty, but I’ve always used the back left. No biggie. Good thing pants come with pockets on each side. The fact that I do things differently has never been a problem; more of a curiosity.

I procured a lovely, new pair of wool pants from Banana Republic over the holiday. This morning I put them on and went to put my wallet in the pocket, only to realize, you guessed it, the left pocket is fake.

FAKE. As in, as of today, I am forced to carry my wallet in the same pocket as my brethren. I am uncomfortable and cranky. It’s particularly bad when I am sitting (most of the day). Since I was 6 or 8 years old, I’ve done something one way and now I’m doing it differently. Ugh.

Here comes the hard decision. I now have this pair of pants that I really like, all except for the back pocket situation. I wonder how long it would take my ass to get used to sitting on a wallet on the opposite side. Days? Weeks? Months? Because I’m thinking that this is bound to happen again, and I might as well begin the adjustment and carry my wallet on the same as everyone else. Is that giving in? If so, what are my choices?

I originally thought I’d write about this as a metaphor for a much more interesting, real social problem. Something regarding the fear of and inevitability of change. How we all get stuck doing something one way, thinking it’s right, but one day are forced to make a change; unsure of whether it’s the right choice. The only certainty is that it must be done.

But really, I’m just pissed I have to carry my wallet on the wrong side today. This is crap.

I’m an idiot. Please see the comments for more details.