I made the big decision Tuesday morning to move out. I’m moving in with my friend Jason. I’m not certain that’s the right call…. will be leaving behind so much… but it’s time to make something new of my days, and I don’t see that happening where I am.
Since I started my new job, I’ve been teetering on the edge of what seems like total implosion. I’ve been mostly drunk. I’ve fallen in and out, in and out, and in, but can’t seem to figure out how to reconcile. I do find solace in the fact that I can only think of two of you that will actually be invited to read this, and that makes it easy. No more hiding…. not that I’m so good at that anyway. I’m a heart on my sleave kind of guy, but that gets me more trouble than not. I can’t think of the last time I spoke my true my mind and didn’t have someone say, “Dude, you can’t think like that.” I guess that’s what I get for living on the moral edge. The right answers are never the selfish ones, and damnit if I’m not fucking selfish at root.
I acquired the latest Andrew Bird album yesterday. The only thing I can think to equate it to is Apple Venus Volume I in such a way that it’s so prolific and perfect for its place. I highly recommend it to anyone with a love for the craft of songwriting and recording. I’ve only started to be able to grasp the lyrical content, but musically it’s full throttle.
I guarantee the next 6 weeks or so will be a bit nutty coming from my world, but my plan is to calm the shit down. Bear with me. Perhaps soon I will write on something usefully universal, but for now, it’s all about the rant. All apologies.
Currently listening to: Andrew Bird & the Mysterious Production of Eggs